Feature of the week

This blog has so many random subjects. I never know what is going to be written next.  Whatever I am feeling or think I want to talk about, that is what goes up. 

Eventually, I want this blog to feature one missing person a week. I want to feature their story and help spread the word about their loved one's disappearance. I think it has been so good for my family and I to FINALLY have a conversation about my brothers disappearance. You might call it on-line therapy, I call it getting real. It is so refreshing when you finally break through someone's shell and get to know the "real" person.

With my brother going missing the silence was almost deadly. First, he went missing. Second, you don't know what to think. So we as a family, tried to think positively and almost pretend he was just still living. Most appeared to go about their lives unphased by the situation. Third, we did not talk about it. We may have scratched the surface here and there, but mostly, it was just too painful to get into. The wounds are so deep. The tears so hard to control. the emotion so powerful.

My friend Emily came over to chat yesterday. LOVE her!!! She had just come back from Kauai, Hawaii. She felt she needed to talk to me and had been trying to get a hold of me but sometimes I'm not very easy to get a hold of;) Technology and me are not friends. After calling me for a few days she just showed up at my door. (I love that she loves she enough to be persistent.) I'm telling you, get a good group of friends. They will save you when you are down.

She told me how her trip went and that she went on the kololoa  trail. She told me how beautiful the island was and how much fun her and her husband had. They went on a boat ride around the island and by all the cliffs and the tour guide told of a legend.

Many people have died off the kololoua trail. The cliffs there are so dangerous. The legend says that those who fall of those cliffs live on into the eternities and bring the island all its beauty. 

I know there is more to the legend but it is something like that. Emily said she felt stupid but the story touched her so much that she got a little emotional. This surprisingly comforted me.The thought that he could be at rest is a great comfort. There is a  99.9999999% chance that that is the case. I just have that nagging .1111111% chance that he is still alive. And  that still pulls at me evey now and again. 

The tour then took them to this "dangerous" beach by the kololoua trail. Here you can build a rock type tower  in honor of a loved one who has passed on. She could have built one for anyone she wanted. She built one for Jesse. I was stunned. I didn't know what to say. Shocked by my own emotions, I tried to regain the words to form in my mouth, "Wow. Ummm...Thank you...." I whispered. I bowed my head and began to sob. She came over and gave me a big hug. We both sat and cried for a moment. I pulled back and said, "Thank you for doing what I cannot do yet. I am just not ready to go there." She smiled. She understood why. She got emotional and she never knew him. GREAT! I'm gonna be a wreck:)

CURSE THIS WEEK! I am a crying MESS!!! Don't worry I got it under control. They have all been happy tears, I think:)

I have the next feature of a missing person coming up. He is just like Jesse in so many ways. His mother is still desperately searching for him. He went missing in Kauai, Hawaii a few years ago. I will be keeping all posted when his story is up. When it is up, Please spread the word. This family could use all the help they can get.                                                 Thanks, niki